This little Hank of mine.

Hank always has a ball with him. Everyday he hands me his shoes and asks to go outside to play with his "boop" (hoop). He would shoot baskets all day long if I let him. And when he gets done practicing his shots, he puts the ball on the ground, pushes me against the wall, and kicks the ball to me. "Sotter" he says. If I go inside for a second, he whines until I come back out either to watch or pass the ball with him. Although it is April, some mornings our winter coats are still needed.

And although Hank is all boy...this kid loves his blankets and binkie like nobody's business. After some morning errands this is where I found Hank...asleep on the floor after trying to pull his blanket from the crib. For whatever reason, he must have both blankets. 

Last week, Hank was sick all week and after two trips to the pediatrician...we finally found that pesky ear infection delaying his recovery. (I had ear infections all the time as a child...I'm starting to think Hank is following suit.) He had a rough time sleeping and found his way into our bed many a night. Most nights, he kept requesting the "toutch" "show" and "buzz". He just wanted to sleep on the couch and watch a show...specifically Toy Story. This quickly turned into a bad habit which has now been nipped in the bud. It was hard to say no to his cute little face and high pitched requests. 

Hank is also loving Go, Dog, Go! Just like Ruby. (This was one of my favorites as a child as well. My dad still talks about me saying, "It's a dog party!"). Surprisingly, Hank will sit through the entire story. 

I sure love this kid. Tantrums and all. Just the other day I wouldn't give him a treat at the grocery store so he had to run away full force until he found a caution cone to kick. This type of thing happens whenever he gets mad. I find it hard not to laugh. But on the other hand, he melts my heart when I hear his sweet "pease" when he wants a bottle of milk and then says "tay too" after I give it to him. Or watching him sleep so peacefully after a long day of playing hard. I also won't forget the smile that spread across his face when I picked him up from nursery a few Sundays back. He was so glad to see me...and I felt so lucky to be the mom that got to scoop him up and take him home. 

 Friday date night...

...with this handsome dude.

Hugh had a BYU soccer game and Miss Ruby has been feeling sick almost the whole week, leaving the night wide open for Hank and me. Initially, I was pretty bummed about the way our night seemed to be shaping up. After having to cancel our fun filled day...easter egg dying with cousins, time with cousin Gwen, and a birthday party for one of Ruby's new "Pleasant Grove" friends as she would say, I felt like maybe we could make dinner with my Dad and sisters to celebrate McCall's birthday. Needless to say, after a long week, I have been looking forward to getting out of the house. But, as the night went on, it was clear that Roo wasn't feeling up for leaving. (I have now realized how selfish I was to be so bummed about the change of plans when Ruby is feeling so rotten.) After watching a few Disney shows, Ruby appeared to be snuggled up in bed for the night at 7pm.

After playing outside on our balcony for most the night, I persuaded Hank to come in for some pizza. So there we sat, just the two of us, enjoying a Costco frozen pizza. And suddenly, all my disappointment about the day and night disappeared and I felt so fortunate to be sitting at the table with my little Hank. The second I brought the camera out he said "cheese" with a mouthful of cheese pizza. So fitting, right?

I'm grateful to be a mom...mostly because of the important lessons it teaches me. Here are the take home messages for me from tonight:

1. Be less selfish and worried about my own needs/wants.

2. Enjoy my kids now, they won't be little forever. And a Friday night spent playing basketball on the balcony (even if Hank MAKES me stand-up the whole time) is time well spent.

3. Go with the flow....learn how to let go of my expectations and make the best of the situation at hand. Especially when things happen out of my control.

**And for memory's sake, Hank LOVES playing with his basketball hoop now that we put it outside. Almost as much as he likes kicking the ball. He would be out there all day if I let him. Today, he brought me his shoes asking to put them on so he could go outside. He is growing up fast. Talking a lot and making me smile a lot. 

Happy, Happy Birthday!

So excited to celebrate my mom today. It's a big birthday for her this year... so we are hoping to make it a good one. Mostly, I just hope she knows how much we love her. As you can tell from this picture, Ruby adores her "Grandma Suzi", and it is so wonderful to watch my mom be a grandma. I love this picture because you can see how my mom glows in her role as Ruby and Hank's grandma. Just like everything else in her life, my mom is a "go the extra mile" kind of grandma.

Happy Birthday, Mom! Hope it is a good one...you really deserve it. You are truly someone to be celebrated. Your example of hard-work, service, and generosity has helped me become the person I am today. And now that I am a mother, I am starting to more fully appreciate all the sacrifices you have made along the way on my behalf.

Let the celebration begin!

Lucky to be their mom.

The addition of little Hank to our family has been very special. I like to think I have always appreciated being a mother...but somehow, Hank has taken that appreciation to a whole new level. More than ever, I am finding myself content with just staying at home and hanging out with these two....which, these days consists of making "eggs and dinner" with Ruby in her kitchen set while holding and adoring the Hankster. Somedays, I wish I could sit on the couch, hold Hank, and just look at him. He's darn cute...even Ruby frequently says, "Hank...you're so cute." She loves him too, and it is fun watching her adapt to being a big sister to her little brother (although, she is still talking about her baby sister who is apparently still in heaven). My favorite is when she comes into our room in the morning, climbs into the bed, and starts talking to Hank in a sweet little voice while placing her cute little hands on Hank's face. Hank usually responds with a flash of his darling grin. Man, I'm lucky to be a mom.

...and on a funny note. While getting ready for bed and reading books, Ruby let out a little toot. Hugh jokingly said, "Excuse me." Ruby got a funny little grin on her face, and turned to Hugh and responded, "That's okay. You can boof in my room." She already has a cute sense of humor.

Nesting. It has begun.

The past couple of weeks I have been getting things in order around the house to welcome our little baby home. It has made me so happy and given me a much needed renewal of energy. Months ago I cut squares from fabric I bought for a baby blanket, and thanks to my mom's new sewing machine, finally turned those squares into a blanket for babe #3. I'm quite happy with the way it turned out. I washed blankets, clothes, burp cloths, and onesies this week to have ready. And there is a pile of items accumulating on my dresser that I want to bring with me to the hospital....my favorites are the two outfits to bring our babe home in. Which will it be...girl one or boy one? I also ordered some gender neutral swaddling blankets that came in the mail the other day, and as I unwrapped them Ruby quickly stated, "those are for the boy, mom." Clearly the absence of pink or purple makes them unsuitable for a girl :). I should mention that lately, Ruby is under the impression we are bringing two babies home. Baby Hughie and a baby sister. The confusion started when I continually reminded her that the baby might not be a girl, but a boy. The thought that a boy means her brother Hughie, remains firm in her sweet little mind...along with the thought that we are having a "baby sister"; therefore, two babies.

I am feeling ready for this little babe to come...quite excited, actually. This pregnancy has been the roughest for me, physically as well as mentally. I have been quite nervous about everything going okay, from the welfare of the babe to the actually delivery. But now with my due date quickly approaching, I'm feeling less nervous and more confident. It has been nice getting all this baby stuff ready because I've enjoyed some sweet moments just thinking about this baby and how wonderful it is to be adding another child to our family. Lately, I've been feeling that it is a little boy (and in my mind I think of the name I would love to give a son...we are still not 100% set on a boy name) swimming around in there, jabbing me and causing bouts of heartburn. But then, could Ruby be right about all this "baby sister" talk? Will a sweet little Ines be joining our family? (we are pretty certain about our girl name :). Thinking about this baby, I mostly hope he/she will know how much I love him/her already...and someday when my children go back and read this old blog, I hope they will each feel special in their own way because of the unique individuals that they are. I can't wait to meet our sweet babe #3.

Babies and Growing-Up.

I remember taking these pictures of Ruby every month until she reached a year. It is hard to believe that now, she totes monkey around and most currently dresses monkey (and all her other dolls and animals) in babe #3's clothes. And everyone, including herself, must get into pajama's just for naptime!

Looking back at Ruby's baby pictures tonight, I can hardly believe how grown-up she is getting. It is exciting and heart wrenching all at the same time. Ruby and I spent the night at my mom's and she had us all laughing and smiling most of the evening. She is a funny little girl. Very articulate and particular about how things should be done. But she is quick to say "thank you" if you give her a compliment or do something nice for her. Lately, she is also good at making "deals" and just today learned about formulating different "options". Like tonight, when she was coming up with a plan to get someone to go outside with her and after informing me of her plan she asked, "is that a good option, mom?" Ruby also likes all things pretty and quickly let me know tonight that my shoes weren't pretty (only pink, girlie stuff warrants prettiness). She also thinks using "cute" as a compliment is strictly reserved for babies. I told her I thought Troy Bolton was cute and she quickly corrected me that "he's not a baby, mom". I took Ruby to my non-stress test appointment the other day and her sweet curiosity made me proud to be her mom. She even brought her toy doctor bag to the appointment and when the nurse was getting me settled, Ruby whispered to me, "here's my doctor stuff, give it to her so she can use it". I had been nervous about bringing her along, but as we sat there together, listening to our sweet babe's little heartbeat, I was glad to share such a special moment with Ruby. She is my little buddy. And she is going to be a great big sister.

Ruby's baby pictures also have me thinking about the sweet little babe that will be joining our family in a month (or so). I'm getting exciting to meet this babe of ours and have the joy in our home that a newborn brings. I can hardly believe it is getting so close. Naturally, I have been stressing a bit about the labor and delivery...and praying that all will go well in getting this baby here. I've been reading some books and Hugh and I have been practicing our "techniques" for the labor...that's what Hugh calls them, anyway...pretty funny! Hugh is great. When I asked him if he had any intuitions about the gender of this babe...he simply replied in true Hugh fashion, "No. I just know it is ours." And that was the end of that. Tonight, at my mom's, I started working on the baby blanket I'm making for babe #3. The very blanket I will take this babe's monthly pictures on. I can't wait. And I'm sure, before we all know it, I will be babbling on and on how he/she is growing-up right before my eyes. Oh! I can't wait to meet this babe!

It's Mother's Day!

This past weekend I have been childless. Ruby got to spend Friday night to Sunday morning at her Grandma Suzi's because I had to work both Friday and Saturday nights. Thanks mom for giving up your entire weekend to chase Ruby around. The only highlight of being alone was that I got to jam to the music of my choice to and from work, no Taylor Swift. Needless to say, I really missed Ruby and it was pretty rough. I know my previous post mentioned how Ruby and I had been occassionally driving each other crazy, I realized this weekedend, I wouldn't have it any other way. This Mother's day I am so grateful to be Ruby's mom. And let's not forget Hughie and this little tyke grooving in my belly. I'm not going to lie, most days it is hard work and exhausting...keeping up with Ruby all while growing a baby, but it's oh so sweet and worth it. I like this quote from Elder Ballard:

"Recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction..."

I also got to thinking, as I drove to work last night, I am so thankful for the wonderful mother's who help me take care of Ruby. I couldn't do it alone and I am so grateful I don't have to. Ruby loves being with both her Grandma's because she knows how much they love her. And how would I ever be able to work without the help of my sister-in-law, Kristina, she treats Ruby as her own...Ruby loves when I go to work because she knows the next morning she gets to go to the Christopherson's. She usually tells me, "When you go to work daddy will sleep with me and take me to Christopherson's." Not to mention all the other mom's in my life whose examples help me want to be a better mom. Thank goodness for great mom's! There are everywhere.

{Ruby and I at Disneyland}

Thank you Ruby, Hughie, and little one for making me a mom. Happy Mother's Day!

**I wrote this last night at work. But here's how my mother's day actually went down. After two nights shifts in a row, a very tired Ruby, and an even more tired mom...we had a HUGE melt-down. I say we because it involved both Ruby and I. She was in tears and besides herself, I was in tears and yelling (I may have even locked myself in the bathroom for a few minutes). Ruby was acting like a two-year-old and so was I...I am a bit ashamed. We started unraveling while talking to Hugh on skype and Ruby was consistently pushing buttons and moving the mouse when I asked her not to. I feel bad that we weren't able to have a better conversation with Hugh, but so it goes. Once we hung-up with Hugh everything fell apart. But after our 20 minute melt-down we recovered and I'm lucky that little Ruby doesn't hold a grudge and she still loves me. And as we drove to my mom's for dinner, listening to her sweet voice singing Taylor Swift brought me joy. She's two she has an excuse...and I'm a mother, I guess that's my excuse. No mother is perfect, right?

I'd also like to say my evening turned out nice. A great dinner cooked by my two wonderful sisters, followed by some relaxing and chatting with my mom, Mal, Call, and uncle Chad. All while having Ruby and her cute personality entertain us all.

In love.

With our little babe...babe #3. This will be the name of our newest addition until we get to meet him/her in August. Today was our 20 week ultrasound, so we got a sneak peak. Everything went well, and no red flags stood out to the tech. I feel very relieved, happy, and grateful. My heart has been full all afternoon. The suspense of the ultrasound was in the health and growth of our babe, so finding out the gender really was irrelevant...and Hugh and I are excited for the surprise come August. Babe #3 was kicking and grooving and stretched across my belly with its little bottom poking out and its feet tucked underneath (right above my bladder...explaining my frequent trips to the bathroom). Tonight when I showed Ruby one of the pictures the tech printed for us, she excitedly asked if we should put it in her room. She quickly raced into her room and I helped her put it on her shelf next to hers and Hughie's framed ultrasound pictures. She was pleased. I really think she is going to be a great big sister. I learned this with Hughie and I'm learning it all over again...love for your children only multiplies with each one, never divided between them.

the babe's little body all curled up in the womb

and a darling little foot

Tonight, in the midst of my excitement about this new little babe, my heart does ache a bit for our sweet Hughie. The ultrasound today was so different than Hughie's and looking back I realize just how concerned the tech was about Hughie from the start...the feeling in the room was like night and day. But as imperfect as Hughie may have seemed at his 20 week ultrasound, he really is more perfect than I could ever hope to be. And although our journey with Hughie was difficult and tumultuous, I'm not sure I would want to give it all back. Sure I wish everyday that I could just hold my little man, but tonight, as I looked at the ultrasound pics of my three precious children, I really felt so blessed. I'm grateful to a loving Heavenly Father for these blessings, and the bitter and sweet lessons that are learned from being a mother.